Night's Clarity
by Miyu29
Summary: An abused girl commits suicide, and her friend accidentally dies with her. Dead people aren't supposed to wake up. Nonetheless in a different world. Gaaraxoc gaara/oc Minor Kankurouxoc/ squinty Kibaxoc !two different oc's! Suicide, beating, angst-y?
1. Dead people don't wake up

**I do not own Naruto! Or some very...strange things would happen. Let's leave it at that.**

**Parts of this story are dark, and will be angst-y. Just warning you. Umm, beating, suicide, depressive thinking. Two teenage 'deaths'...**

* * *

He punched me in the face.

_That's alright._

He picked me up and threw me against the wall, and my head hit it.

_Any more?_

He kicked me in the ribs and slapped me.

_It's my fault, right?_

He began to punch over and over again.

_No problem._

I sat there. My eyes were probably lifeless. I didn't make any noise. I sat there quietly and let this man beat me. It was nothing new. It happened every day, drunk or not. This man- my _father, _though he doesn't deserve that title. It was either because I looked like my mother, or because I was just wrong, an accident. Only one new thing happened today. He pulled out a pocket-knife, yeah. That was definitely new. He dug it into my arm slowly, and I let out something loud and high-pitched. He just smiled, and dug it in a little deeper, then pulled it out, kicked me one last time, and walked away. I stood up, slowly, giving my body some time to cope with the new treatment. I pressed my hand over the wound, it was probably a quarter of an inch deep, and it was an inch long. I stumbled to the door, my vision blurred a little from getting hit by the wall. Some of my black, curly hair caught in a nook. Bringing my injured arm's hand up, I freed it and continued on my journey. I opened the door, and walked out. I went down the side-walk, and reached Nina's house. I knocked on the door. She, of course, answered. Her parents were traveling people. They let Nina down here, and convinced child services Nina was fine.

"Kimi..." She whispered.

She pulled me inside, and set me on the couch. Always ready, she brought some gauze over to help me. She disinfected my cut, and she winced for me. That was a thing about Nina. Whenenver she knew something hurt me, and I didn't react, she would wince or ow for me. All in all- Nina was like my sister, and her mine. She had medium brown/red hair, with dark green eyes. Whilst I had black hair and blue eyes. It was a strange shade of blue- it was very light, and people would ask me if I was blind. I, of course, got irritated each time. She wrapped the cut, and turned on the TV. Me and Nina would watch a ninja show. It was called Naruto. I liked watching the battles, and Nina was interested with the characters. She would swoon after a few of them, and I would stare at her.

"You're staying here tonight." She said, simply.

I didn't disagree, because if I did, she would force me anyways. We sat there, and then, suddenly, Nina pulled out a chocolate weapon of sorts from the show, and nibbled on it. I stared, transfixed on wherever the hell she got it. I shrugged. Nina was really into the show, and I was alright with it. I zoned out, thinking. I made it look like I was watching the show. My life sucked, I suppose. I'm really living for... I'm living for... I'm...

So I have no idea.

It didn't matter. Before I move out, that man would probably kill me. He slapped me once, then two days later, he started punching me. After a week, he started kicking. A month, throwing, and now, after two solid months of beating me, he pulled a knife. At this rate, in a year or two, I would die. That would be a full two years before I could move out at the longest period of time. Yes, me and Nina were fourteen. Suddenly, a lot started to feel pointless. Treating this wound. Sleeping at Nina's. Having fun. Being here. It would end in a year or two, anyways. My look darkened. Nina and I went to sleep in about two hours, and each minute, I probably got worse with this thinking.

I left a note for Nina.

I walked into her kitchen, and in the cupboard, was Nina's gun. She kept it, though it was illegal, to protect herself. I stared at it emptily. I grabbed it, and then walked out of the house, without looking back at Nina's sleeping form. I walked out to the woods that Nina and I had claimed as our own. I slid down into out little house made of big branches, and large leaves. I made sure to duck, so that I didn't get caught by our security briars right above the doorway. I sat on the ground, indian style, and looked at the gun. Nobody would hear, nobody would know. Nobody but Nina. I said a quick goodbye and sorry to my metaphorical sister, and put the gun in my mouth. My eyes darkened, and I cleared my head. None of those whiny thoughts. No regrets -but the one for Nina. No thoughts. No expectations.

I pulled the trigger.

* * *

I woke up with a yawn. I looked around, and Kimi wasn't in her bed. I scowled. There was a note on her pillow, and the sheets were neatly made. I looked at the note.

_Nina._

_Truly, I apologize._

_You're the only one that will miss me. I'm sorry about your gun, too. I'm in our other home, and I'm dead. _

_I thought about it yesterday- that man would kill me before I could move out, anyways._

_I'd die in a year or two, so there was really no reason other than you to live._

_It's not that you're not enough, but sooner is always better than later._

_Love you, sis._

_Kimi._

I cried.

I cried as hard as I could for a long time. I decided that she wasn't dead until I saw her. I went out to our woods and went into our little home. Sure enough, Kimi was there, and she was laying there, the barrel of the gun was hanging slightly from her mouth and hand, and I grabbed her.

"Kimi. Kimi. Wake the fuck up already!" My voice cracked a little as I yelled at her.

"This isn't fucking funny, Kimi!" I screeched.

I slumped over her, and sobbed. I held one of her hands and laced my fingers with it, sobbing uncontrollably. Kimi began to fade, and that, I realized, was wrong. I started to fall, and I set my hand down hard. Then the untinkaable happened. The gun went off, and hit me. And as my vision faded, I saw that I was fading with her.

What could be happening...?

* * *

I woke up. Dead people weren't supposed to wake up. I looked around- and I was in a clearing in a forest; Nina's hand was entertwined with mine. Maybe we were in heaven?

Or hell.

No; Nina would go to heaven. I would not.

So where were we?

* * *

**Review, please.**


	2. Dead

**I don't own Naruto. /sadface.**

**I know somebody was like 'I wonder who's gonna find them...'. But I'd rather not stick completely to the presets:)**

* * *

I looked around. Our woods were different. I was still wearing my regular clothing, but Nina was wearing her pyjamas. We had to either get out of here, or wait for someone do find us. I wouldn't risk that. Two girls who's clothes were bloodied, and yet, weren't injured? Suspicious. We'd get questioned. Of course, I had to get a direction. I sighed, and looked down Nina, staring at her. Would she live better if I was dead? Yes, probably. She would be a social butterfly, talking to everyone she could. She would be amazing, and would have many more friends. I closed my eyes.

I'm the one holding her back.

People take a glance at my cold composure, and how I don't talk to many people, and often leave Nina when she's with me. They don't like me. They love Nina. Nina- she was very pretty. Her colors were average, but looked so- different on her. People loved how she looked, and people loved how she spoke and carried herself. She's caring, and could never feel ill to someone she didn't know. When I said that I hated this girl I barely knew, she practically hit me.

"Everything has a back story, Kimi! Give people chances, and maybe you'd have more than just me." She had said the last part softer.

I didn't need anyone else, because Nina was my sister, and she took care of me. I take, I take, I take. When do I ever give? Never.

I ran around and gathered food, water, and everything she would need for about five days. Someone would have to find her by then. The meadow- it looked like it had been walked around and on many times before, so it had to be a popular passing route. I had gotten apples, firewood, surprisingly, some deer, and a hare. I had set up one of those stupid box traps for the rabbit, and I had actually found the deer. I set up a pit for her, and placed rocks around it. I went up into a tall tree, going to find my destination. A while away was a very big town. I couldn't make it out that well, but whatever. I went back down the tree, and I left her some matches and one of my pocket-knives that I always had on me. I crouched down next to her, and spoke into her ear softly.

"I'm going to disapear now, Nina."

I smiled sadly, and began walking in my direction.

* * *

_I'm going to disappear, now, Nina._

Kimi's voice was chilling. It felt like it wasn't her- almost. I knew it was her, though. Who else would say something so sadly to me? Who else did I die with? Nobody. I woke up, and my vision clouded up. It took a minute or two for it to clear back up. I sat up slowly, and slumped over with my head in my hand. Honestly- It felt like I had been hit with a few dozen trucks. then suddenly, I remembered.

Wasn't I dead?

Then where in god's name was this? It certainly was not golden gates of heaven- or fiery depths of hell. I died with Kimi. I died.

I suddenly looked around wildly for Kimi. She wasn't anywhere to be seen. Maybe she was getting us more stuff? All around me, there were supplies and some free-strike matches. Kimi had gotten all of this? It looked like there was a hare and deer, too. I knew how to prepare and skin them, and there was a wide variety of berries and apples, a cooking pit was already made out, and there were various footprints all over the meadow. I decided that I'd make the deer, so that when Kimi got back, we could eat and figure out what the hell was going on.

"Thank you." I said quietly.

I set to my work of skinning and such, and made sure to use as much as the deer as I could. You don't sacrifice an animal and then only eat it. What was the point of that? Yeah.

'I'm gonna kill you so I can eat your insides then leave everything else.'

Honestly? Let me do that to you. How are you going to feel?

I set up a fire, and smiled when Kimi forgot to get small things like dead grass and branches. Me and Kimi loved camping, so we learned how to do stuff like this. I grabbed some of the grass around me, thinking it would have to do. I striked a match and set it on the firewood, and the grass crackled and caught on fire, then so did the wood. I put the deer on some fallen branches after making sure there were no ants or bugs or anything on them, and held it near the fire. It cooked slowly. Night came, and my expression darkened.

She wasn't coming back. Or she was really dead.

I sighed, and curled into a ball. I'm really alone.

The stars watched me; they were always silent guardians. The moon looked down from it's throne and stared at me. The trees stood solid around me, the grass bended to my shape, and the ground stayed put.

The world had nothing to say about it.

I shut my eyes tightly.

Alone.

The word scared me more than ever.

* * *

I walked quietly among the ever growing trees. They towered over all, leaving things in their majesty. I was always awed by trees. Always awed by the solid earth. Always awed by every thing's connection. I was no longer part of any connections. I was dead. No, correction. I am dead. I'm walking- breathing, and I'm seeing and hearing. But I knew what I was.

Dead.

There was no argument for this. I shot myself in the head, a fatal blow. I felt no energy from the trees, nor the solid earth. Only the need to drone on. Walk, walk, walk.

There was no feel to this. I committed suicide. My body was numb. I didn't want to comprehend. I didn't need to. Walk, walk, walk.

Drone, drone, drone.

My eyes shut easily.

Why was I moving on? I had no reason to. I had no reason to do anything. Dead is dead. But Nina... I had to get away from her. I was dead. The dead need to stay dead, no matter how you look at it. I continued walking. I opened my eyes. I had to get away. What if she came looking for me...? She would think I was alive.

No.

I refuse for that to happen.

I began running. I began sprinting. I did whatever I could to get away as fast as possible. I did that until I could not breathe, though I didn't know when that was. I rested until I regained my ability to breathe correctly, and I climbed another tree. The place was not too far away, maybe thirty more minutes at the pace I was just going. Nostalgia swept over my when I saw a ig red building in the middle of it, but I thought nothing of it. Why should I? I continued at my fast pace, and stopped once in the thirty minutes it took to get there. I stumbled out towards the gates, and the guards looked at me curiously. I looked up at them through my bangs. I needed to get inside. Away from Nina. I was dead. I had to make sure of that. I looked up at them, and they had an intake of breath. They stared at me, and I at them.

I opened my mouth to talk, but I was breathing irregularly from sprinting for fifteen minutes straight. The oxygen wasn't getting to my brain, and I knew that I would pass out. I shook my head. The gaurds looked at me worried.

"All you alright?" One asked.

"Does it fucking look like I'm alright?"

It was a fierce voice. It was emotionless. It was chilling.

And I didn't know it was my own voice.

The guard took a step back.

"Do you need to get in?" Two asked.

"Yes, I really do. I need a place to stay- I'm exhausted, and I'm not going to wait."

They just nodded, and I was let in. I was also told that I needed to see the Hokage in the big red building first. More nostalgia. I walked slowly towards the building. People gave me strange looks. People stared. People lived. I didn't care what I looked like or how I just droned on. I was dead. Why did I have to? My bangs covered my eyes. I walked. I droned. The building came closer to me, and then I opened the door and walked in. I asked where the Hokage was, and they gave me directions, up the stairs and to the right, first door. I followed their directions, and knocked.

"Come in." An older man's voice called.

I entered.

He looked at me questioningly.

"I need a place to stay." I said.

He blinked. Maybe shocked at my voice.

"Where are you from?" He asked.

"I'm from..." I began.

"Virginia." I closed my eyes.

The truth didn't matter. So I told him. Why did it matter?

"Excuse me?" He asked.

"Virginia. I commited suicide, and I woke up in the woods. I was confused. I made my way to your village." I stated.

"That's a strange tale you're spinning. How do I know your telling the truth?" He asked.

I stared him straight in the eyes.

"I shot my self in the mouth with a shotgun. I died moments after. My clothes are splattered with my own blood, and there is a scar on the back of my head." I said.

He stared in my eyes. He then shut his own and nodded.

"It's strange. You're not lying at all. I would know." He said.

"I know."

"As for where you can stay, I suppose you can ask around to see if people have any space." He said.

I faltered.

"I'm not good with people." I said.

"That's quite alright. You'll find someone." He said.

I nodded, and walked outside. Looking around, I made my way to a shop. It looked like a ramen stall, so I guessed that was what it was.

I needed to eat. Hunger ate at my stomache. I dug in my pocket, and there was about five dollars. I walked inside of the stall, and sat down. There was a boy chowwing down about a stool or two away from me, a pink haired girl, and a raven haired boy. The shop owner came over to me.

"What will it be, miss?"

"One chicken, please." I said.

The man faltered, then regained his nice attitude.

"Okay!"

Those three would be the ones I asked first.

* * *

**I know Kimi is killing everyone with her droning and beating a dead horse every time she says she's dead. Please bare with me.**


	3. Sakura

**I'm completely ecstatic that I've gotten reviews on my first chapter, and my second one too. **

* * *

I walked silently over to them, and stood behind one of them until they had noticed me.

"Yes?" The pink haired girl replied.

My head had been down, covering my light blue eyes. I looked up at her, and she took an intake of breath. The other two boys turned around and looked at me.

I closed my eyes for a moment, then after re-opening them, I sent out the best vibes I possibly could, and pretended to be Nina. Nina, the social butterfly, Nina, who's smile was amazing.

I smiled at her, and began to speak, willing my voice to have the nicest emotion placed into it.

"The Hokage needed me to ask around and see if anyone has any room in their house. I've just come to this village, and I really need a place to stay." I said.

The raven haired boy stared questioningly at me for a moment, glancing at my smile then my eyes. He shook his head and turned around. The pink-haired girl's eyes brightened, and she smiled back. The blond boy smiled as well.

"I do!" They both called.

I looked back and forth.

"Ah, what are all of your names, first? I'm sorry. I'm Kimi." I said.

"I'm Sakura, this is Naruto.. and this is Sasuke!" She replied cheerily.

Nostalgia again. Where had I heard those names? Where...

"Well, Naruto's okay, but he's too hyper! Sasuke is the hottest!" Nina's voice.

It hit me.

I was...in our show. What the...? I regained my composure, after faltering for a moment, and I looked at them both.

"Okay, then Sakura. I'll stay with you. Is that alright?" I asked.

"Yeah, It's fine! When should we get your stuff?" She asked.

"I.." I began, wincing. "I don't have anything."

Sasuke furrowed his eyebrows. Naruto looked at me funny. Oh, what a show. I hate acting. It's the worst. All lies. All lies. My name is Kimi, I'm such a chipper gal. You'll never find anyone happier than me!

I mean...

Really?

"Oh, okay then..." Sakura replied, awkwardly.

"Are you a ninja?" Naruto asked excitedly.

"Ah...no. I'd learn if I could, though." I smiled.

"You can't?" He asked.

"No, I just come from a place where we don't have many ninjas." I smiled sweetly at him.

I wanted to barf. I couldn't be this sweet.

"One chicken ramen!" I heard the owner call. I went back to my seat, and the others came to sit next to me. I looked down at my ramen, and I frowned, not being able to hold up the smile much longer. I ate like this, so nobody could see my face. I closed my eyes, and let out the smallest sigh. I re-opened them and ate my ramen in silence. I was completely aware of Sasuke staring at me strangely, as if he knew I was dead. It was funny, really. Such a kid was too damn smart for his own good. If he found me out, I would be seriously pissed. I would have been sweet for nothing. Sweetness- is- admittedly, not my best subject. An act wouldn't be hard to keep up, It was actually easy. I ate my ramen, then Sakura led me back to her house and showed me my room after we had a talk with her parents. I curled up in a ball on my bed, and I sat there. I closed my eyes, but I didn't sleep. After a while, I sighed. I wasn't gonna sleep, I knew that. I climbed out of my widow expertly, and landed on the roof. I closed my eyes, and felt the breeze touch my face. I looked up at the sky, and noticed the stillness of everything. It was put on hold, social life. People slept, and the starts were the only ones to keep me company.

They radiated no warmth, but they were always there. Like that kid that watches awkwardly as you get beaten up. They sucked. I sucked. The world sucked.

I was dead.

Why was I breathing?

I closed my eyes again, and sighed quietly. The world shouldn't inflict my death. I was dead, and therefor no longer part of nature. The world now ignored me.

Hooray.

* * *

I awoke slowly, the grass was soft beneath me. I began making the hare, because it would go bad soon, if I did not quickly eat it. I made the fire and skinned then cooked it, sighing softly. The wind followed my movement, sighing with me. I the trees swayed to it, and the fire burned a little brighter. The earth and air liked me, and all I needed was to convince the fire and water. They were not taken to me as of yet. They complied, yes, but did not love me. This is crazy, right? A girl saying how in-animate objects like her. It's not. Connections- bonds- are everywhere. I would sing, and the earth and air would listen, swaying with me. The fire would dazzle a little, and the water would stay still. I twirled, and then began cooking. It was my second day alone. I was scared- but my surroundings comforted me. Someone would probably find me soon, at least, I hoped. There were tons of footprints around, so it was a well traveled route. That much I could tell. I just had to wait.

and wait.

and wait.

and wait.

* * *

The sun rose slowly, and the chilling air dissipated into something warmer, but I could feel the air around me stay cold. The sun rose slowly. I stood on the roof, then dropped down on theledge of it, and swung into the room through the window. Sakura was sitting there, waiting for me. She looked at me strangely for a moment, but then Broadway came back to play, and she smiled at me.

"I'm off to training, would you like to come?" She asked.

"Of course!" I said.

I followed her to the training grounds, and turns out, only Sasuke was there. Sakura went to cling onto him, and I sat against a tree on the other side of them. While Sakura was clinging, Sasuke narrowed his eyes at me.

Yeah, I knew he knew about me.

I dropped my act and glared at him profusely. He returned it with one of his own. Naruto then came, and the act came back. Naruto was talking about Sakura or something, and then Sakura chased him off.

"You know, Uchiha, I thought you were a nice guy, but now I'm thoroughly convinced you're just an asshole." I said.

"Nobody ever told you my last name." He said.

"Sakura talks about you in her sleep." I said.

"Hn." He said.

"So, mind telling me why you're acting?" He asked.

"Yeah, it's so that I've got a place to stay." I said, closing my eyes.

"What's wrong with your voice? Are you dead or something?" He asked.

Actually, I was amazed that he could carry a conversastion. Much less ask questions.

"Actually, yes." I said.

"The hell is that supposed to mean?"

I ignored him.

Sakura and Naruto eventually came back, Uchiha glared at me, and I kept acting. Their sensei- Kakashi- came aout two hours later, and I watched them. It was amazingly close to the show. Jutsu's and everything. It seemed they had only banded together a short amount of time ago.

"Ahh- Kimi! You should try too!" Sakura shouted.

"Ah- I don't know," I smiled.

Fake.

"Oh, come on! It couldn't hurt!" She cried.

"Ohhhhkayyyy..." I stated defeated.

She showed me the basics of clone making. I learned the handsigns by the end of the day, and could effectively produce...

A... half of a clone.

Which was good, apparently. But when I did it- it send a fire through my lungs, and I had to steady myself. It was a burst of will and fighting.

I was dead.

How did those come about?

I practiced hours on end, and by the next day, I could make a full clone. Active and working, for about five minutes. I showed everyone else, and they were impressed.

It didn't matter to me, though. I needed more of this- it was horrible, and I only wanted it so I could feel, but it was a moment of flight, and it completely perplexed me. I needed more of this- and I would get what I wanted, no matter what.

* * *

I had nothing to do but practice whatever I could. Everything from Grass-whistling to fighting. It was the third day. I sat down and plled a blade of grass up, then pulled it taut with my thumbs and whistled. I needed some company.

Someone grabbed the blade of grass right from my hands.

"Are you TRYING to attract a wild animal that'll attack you?" A voice shouted.

I blinked, and then my eyes widened as I turned my head.

Kiba.

WHAT THE HELL?

"No, animals are calm around me." I said, Akamaru jumping to my lap.

Kiba looked at me for a moment, then back at Akamaru.

"Say, why are you camping out here, anyways?"

"I was left here." I said, closing my eyes.

"You a ninja?"

"Nope." I said, sighing.

"Well come with me, 'cuz it doesn't look like Akamaru wants to get off of you." He said.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"I've got a one- month mission with my teammates, so as long as you stay out of the way, I bet I could bring you back to Kohona." He said.

I smiled. I'd actually get to see Kohona? That would be amazing.

"Here, get on my back." He said, squatting down.

I climbed on and wrapped my legs around his waist, and my arms around his neck.

"You're really light, you know?"

I blushed, and then he went off with jumping through the trees, adjusting me now and then. We met up with the rest of the team in another clearing..

Kiba explained my situation, and I blushed once. Hinata stuttered when she spoke to me, and Shino just nodded his head. Kurenai looked at me and smiled warmly, but in the ack of her eyes she held some traces of suspicion. Kibs carried me on his back, and the evident rythm of his jumps lulled me to sleep.

* * *

**Thankyouu!**

**Review.**


	4. Escaping

**Whoa! A chapter! Amazing! Rite? Rite?**

* * *

My body ached. Horribly. Honestly- I didn't care. I had produced five clones, and they were all around me. I had kept them up for hours. I could make them sing, talk seperately and together or in units, run, jump, scream, hell, I could make them quack. That's when I noticed, though. Living hurt. Badly.

Whatever the reason, I had not left my high.

The clones followed my will, my concentration never broke.

After all, I had nothing to lose and everything to gain.

When everyone else had arrived, I was sitting down, and making my clones do random tricks. One quacked continuously, two threw each other up in the air, one was reciting a poem, and the other was screaming loudly. Meanwhile, I looked completely bored.

"Whoa! Kimi! Did you do this?" Sakura asked excitedly.

"They are clones of me..." I said, smiling.

Damn mask.

"That's amazing!" Naruto and Sakura both said.

Sakura then bonked Naruto on the head, cue my giggling. The screaming one stopped, and then the two that were throwing eachother around stopped, too. the one reciting poems stopped with some apathetic look that probably went with the last poem. The quacking one then stopped last. They all lined up, bowed, and then poofed away.

I sighed lightly, letting out a breath as the concentration needed left me. My rush died, as did my pain. The numbing sense startled me for a moment, but then I regained my composure. This was my natural state.

I've gotta get used to this.

* * *

We had stopped for the night, and Kiba had sent Akamaru back to Kohona to tell them about me.

Kiba was a huge flirt, but it really wasn't all that bad. I responded a few times, ignoring a few others. I called animals to us constantly, making many friends. I went for a walk alone, and instead of running, the animals stayed where they are. They looked at me calmly, but cautiously. I reached and touched some of the animals, they did not back down.

The forest smiled down on me.

I was in Naruto.

Kiba liked me.

Kurenai didn't trust me. (Not that I mind)

Hinata was shy, as usual.

Shino just...looked at me.

Animals didn't flinch at me.

What more could I ask for?

I smiled, and twirled in the small clearing.

My new life was good.

That one little hole in it, Kimi, though, was missing.

I wanted to see her smile at me.

My expression dropped. I didn't know if she was really dead, but it seemed like it. She was not beside me. She would have stayed with me. My sister, Kimi.

I miss you.

The mirror cracked, and tears fell through. I shut my eyes. The ground came up to me, and I sobbed.

I sang it. Our song. It fell naturally through my lips, and fell out into the air. The new air, untainted air. The words never seemed so sad to us.

Our world never seemed so cold.

_Two little girls took off in the night,_

_To get away from their own fright._

_Nobody cares if they come or go_

_Won't even care if they stubbed a toe._

We had sung it as children, not really knowing the world around us. We knew they didn't care, it hadn't bothered us.

But why does it seem so dark now?

A child's rhyme.

Never was it so demented.

* * *

I danced around with Sakura, as usual. She gushed about Sasuke, and tried to touch my hair. I shook her off, shaking my head.

"I don't really like people touching my hair, sorry." I said.

Sakura just nodded. Sasuke watched us from afar. He knew. It sucked. There was personally nothing I could do. Naruto kept trying to flirt with Sakura, and he got chased off every time.

"Hey, hey! Sakura! Did you hear that Kiba's bringing back a girl in a few weeks? Says her name is Nina," Naruto said.

I froze completely.

They noticed.

I didn't care.

I couldn't.

My mental break-down process couldn't deal with more people.

I hardened my heart and eyes. I would have to run before she came. She could NOT know I was alive. I would have to train endlessly. Become something close to a ninja, but never official. Then, the day before she arrives, I will leave. Swiftly. Quietly. I'll run to another village. Yes, I'll find a map and plan out my escape. I'll leave without notice, in the middle of the night.

I smoothed over my expression.

"Hey, are you okay?" Sakura asked.

"Hahaha, yeah, I'm fine. My head just started hurting all of the sudden! Weird, huh?" I grinned.

"Haha, totally," she smiled back.

Naruto gave me a weird look real quick, and I knew Sasuke was filling up his brain with my reactions. Probably so he could beat me easy. Fun.

Death was suprisingly horrible.

* * *

In a week, I would be in Kohona! I could barely contain myself. I wanted to see Naruto and the gang! I wanted to see Kakashi, too! The hokage would be a fun visit, and I wanted to see the hokage faces on the mountain side, too! I wish Kimi was here. She would have liked this too. I had already convinced myself she was dead, because she would have found me by now. She would be with me. So I sang our song every two nights, making sure that I kept her spirit within me. She may have not noticed it, but she was fun. She knew how t o fend for herself just about anywhere, so she taught me so many things. How to be completely silent as you walk, how to built a makeshift home with branches. She taught me wonderful things, and I helped her wounds whenever I could. Our partnership became friendship, then sistership. She was family.

I miss her.

Horribly.

She would want me to continue living just like this, though. Happy- free, enjoying everything I can. So, that is what I will do. Continue moving forward, continue enjoying anything I can, and to learn everything I possibly can.

In her memory, I am strong.

I am absolute.

I am myself.

And I'm sure she's happy I'm like this.

Watching me from wherever she is, most likely heaven, or the midworld she talked so much about.

* * *

I trained with anyone I could get a hold of, I told them I wanted to get stronger so I could become a genin then chuunin in a fell swoop, apparently chuunin exams were seven or eight months from now. They all agreed to help me. I train all the time, taking breaks when living hurts too much. I eat- I drink. I do everything a living being should. Of course, these breaks took fairly short amounts of time. I trained most of my day, I had no intrest in anything to do with other people, but kept up my mask all the time. They all found me cheerful, and they all trained me regularly. I trained alone through the night hours. I got considerably stronger by the one week 'til mark. In seven days, I had become much stronger than I was before.

Intensive workouts.

Chakra balancing.

Ninjutsu.

Genjustsu.

A shitton of Taijutsu.

Sword training.

I was the best at everything but genjutsu. I suppose I'm not imaginative enough? I don't know, but I suck at it. Sword training was my best subject, followed by ninjutsu.

I sparred often with my other teammates. They noticed how strong I was becoming, and strived with me. Naruto revealed he was the nine-tails. I was not shocked. The others were. Sasuke actually widened his eyes.

"Hey, you finally told them! That's great," I said, patting him on the back.

"Y-You knew?" He asked.

"Yeah. I'm amazing like that," I smiled.

Everyone looked at me weird. I didn't stop smiling.

My training went smoothly. I got stronger. The day to move was almost upon me.

* * *

We were almost there! Just a few more days of traveling and we'd be there! It was amazing, finally getting to see the place of my dreams. I was anxious, and was just itching to meet everyone. I thought of all the people, and squirmed on Kiba's back.

"Haha, what's going on up there? Getting uncomfortable?" He asked

"No. I'm fine. Just excited!" I said.

"Okay then!" He yelled back up.

* * *

I had found a map of the nations. I would have to cross a gray area between sand and forest and then travel through the desert for a while. I got as many jugs as I could, and filled them to the brink with water. A few jugs held some meat I got. Overall, I had about ten jugs on me. Seven of water, and three of food. I made sure to remember to conserve the chakra I had. I left through the window silently, dropping onto the street below. I made my way slowly over to the gates, carful not to get noticed by anyone, and proceeded with my plan. The west gate wasn't too far away, but when I looked around the corner, there was Nina. Of fucking course. I'm sure she caught the slightest glimpse of me, as well as everyone else. Kiba, Kurenai, Hinata and Shino all saw me. Fuck.

I climbed the building rapidly, making sure not to waste any time. Kurenai's red eyes searched for me, and when she spotted me, she pointed. Everyone turned, and I ran along the rooftops until the gate was in view. I opened it and looked at the guards blankly.

"I've got an A-rank mission to the Villagee of the sand. You've got to let me through." I stated, making sure that my mask was not on.

They blinked rapidly, then nodded slowly.

"Of course." They said, stepping aside.

I followed the path directly southwest, because the Sand Village was not just to the west. You had to move down the map a bit and then go completely west.

I let out a sigh, and continued along my chakra-conserving path.

I certainly had none to waste.

* * *

It was a shadow of Kimi, I swore. The curly, long hair. The way she moved quickly and quietly.

Kimi was dead.

She. Was. Dead.

Everyone else saw her, too. I doubt it could have been her, though. Coincidences happend so often to me, it's crazy.

It could not have been her.

It just couldn't.

* * *

**Uhh, I know. I suck for not updating. You can throw cows at me now.**


	5. A Cloak

**Here's a chapter. **

* * *

The sands of the desert were rough. Day was too hot to fathom, and night was colder than the feeling I got when I heard Nina was coming.

I slept right before it became blistering, and awoke when it was cool. I traveled with the night by my side, pressing on, away from the Leaf. There, Nina would begin her life. Nobody would have a real reason to talk about me with her.

If anyone did, it would be that bastard.

One of my jugs of water was gone already, and I had eaten a little. I was using my chakra to speed up my run. Of course, this really didn't help me out on the treacherous journey ahead. The sands began to mingle with every place I could imagine, and that really irritated me. I thought of Nina, hoping that she would be happy in the Leaf. There were plenty of people, and maybe she'd even become a ninja. The thought of her fighting someone and dying slowly because she was a ninja. The thought screwed with my mind, to the point of turning back, but I knew I could never do that. Never could I go back to her, letting her know I was alive. She was to think I was dead. That I had not lived through the ordeal and gone with her. She was to slowly forget about me, never to know that I silently plan my moves according to hers. She could know I was alive not to feel so alone...

The body follows the mind. The heart is just an organ.

Never stop. Press on. Avoid.

This is what I now lived by.

* * *

I woke slowly after sleeping in Kiba's house. I got out of the house after dressing, and made my way around town.

I wanted to meet everyone else so badly! Naruto, mostly.

Duck-butt-head was going to looks good, but was most likely gonna be a douche. That sucked. Alot...

I was exploring, looking for the ramen shop. The, I was sped over by an orange blob.

"Oh, sorry, lady!" Naruto said, holding his hand out.

"Haha, no problem. I'm Nina, who are you?" I didn't want to seem creepy and know everyone.

"I'm Naruto Uzumaki! I'm gonna be the next Hokage, believe it!" He said.

"Cool. Um, Naruto, I'm new, could you show me where the ramen shop is?" I asked.

He grinned, and I knew I had just made Naruto a friend of mine.

He led me as fast as he could to the ramen stand, and he walked in with me. I sat down, and he looked at the ramen longingly.

"Hey, Naruto, want some?" I asked.

He grinned ear to eras and shouted a loud yeah.

"One beef, and one miso, please," I asked, smiling.

The owner nodded quickly.

* * *

The shimmering city in the distance made me check my chakra, food, and water supply. I had enough water to get there, and If I ate my meat when I awoke the next night, then I would make it there full, and have plenty of energy.

I sat in the sand, covering my body with my tattered cloak I had found in Kohona before I left. It had a high collar, and had buckles down to the bottom of my chest, and was kind of like a shawl at first, but then it caped out behind me. The ends were tattered, and it was a red color. The man was sleeping in his bed rather un-peacefully. He tossed and turned, and his black hair was long. I would have found him attractive, but I payed him no attention, for if I got too close, the three-barreled gun would most likely be pointed at me. It was a bit too big, so the tips reached the ground, and if it were full sized like the others, it would drag against the floor. This one, was, however so tattered it barely reached the ground.

He had many more of the cloaks in his closet, and this one was so battered that I'm sure he would be either sad or happy to be rid of it. I put it on, and then opened his window once more. He opened his eyes, and looked at me.

"Who are you?" He had said.

"...Kimi," I said, and then left the man.

I curled up in it, and fell asleep quickly.

Night came, and I consumed enough food and water to get there.

I sped along my path, and met with the city not more than a half an hour later. The guards at the gate looked at me strangely. Black skinny jeans, ninja shoes, and a black shirt that had red patterns on it.

The cloak swept around me, and I looked at the guy.

"Let me in?" I asked.

"Who are you?"

"Kimi," I said.

"Kimi who?"

"Kimi," I began, and then I thought. " Kaoru Kimisuke," I said.

I was mad. I used Sasuke's name ending. I have no idea where Kaoru came from, but whatever.

He opened a small book, and flipped through it. When he got to the end, he nodded and let me in.

"Haha, what, no thank you?" He asked.

I looked back at him coldly, "No, no. None at all," I said.

A visible shiver went down his back, and I chuckled.

The one way to surely keep Nina from seeing me, is to buy a straightener and get a haircut.

So, the first thing I did was make my way to a Hair-cuttery. I planned to make myself look like a boy. The cloak covered any small amount of chest I had, so getting a boy's haircut would make myself look much more like a boy. I flipped through a guys haircut magazine, not really caring. I found one that I liked. It was bangs sweeping to the right, and it was slightly longer than some boys cut their hair. Little peices would fall into my cheek area, and it would end slightly after that. It reminded me of home, there was one boy that had his hair like this. What, I think he was a scene-kid or whatever? I didn't usually pay attention to labels. Or other people.

I walked up to the lady, and asked her for that cut.

She looked at me strangely, unsure whether I was really a boy, or if I was a girl with my long, curly hair. She nodded slowly, and motioned me over to a sink.

She then washed my hair. It smelled like apples. She cut it precisely like in the picture, and straightened it for me after blow-drying it. I looked in the mirror, and I was sure I looked like a boy. My face was slightly feminine, but it really doesn't matter.

I thanked the woman and payed her. She was a little offset by my voice, but disregarded it. I walked into town, and caught people looking at me. Actually, a few girls came up to me after that.

"Haha, who are you?" They asked, batting their eyelashes.

Think of a guys name!

I just looked at them strangely.

"Hn," I copied the Uchiha.

Jesus, if I had to act as that asshole...

They just smiled wider.

"No, really!" They said.

"Kimisuke Kaoru," I said, looking away from them.

I switched my first and last name, believing Kaoru was a boys name.

The sqee'd and walked away.

Great.

I'm becoming that asshole as a boy now.

* * *

After having ramen with Naruto, I told him who I was.

"Haha! Oh, you're her! Yeah, Kiba said he was bringing you back!" He grinned to me.

I smiled. So Kiba went ahead and told everyone? That means everyone knew who I was, and I could meet them at my leisure now!

I thanked Naruto for hanging out with me. I then went back to Kiba's house, and went into my room, explaining that I had already eaten.

I began to sing our song, and I managed to hold my sobs until the second line. The words touched the walls, and the door opened slowly, and I turned to the window.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Kiba asked.

"Huh? Oh, nothing," I lied, forcing my voice to sound normal as I cried silently.

"You sing well," He ventured.

"Haha, I've been told that," I said.

He walked over to me, and I shut my eyes tightly, childishly. As if the tears would dissapear if I closed them. They didn't.

"Whoa, hey! Whats wrong?" He asked.

I shook my head and turned away from him.

"Hey, did I say something wrong?" He asked.

I shook my head again.

"Then what's wrong?" He asked.

"I would be considered crazy if I told you," I said.

"I, for one, know you are sane. Tell me?" He asked.

I told him. Everything.

He stared at me the whole time. At the end, he enclosed me in a hug.

"Nina, where did you get the supplies?" He asked.

My eyes widened.

"I don't know, but it was enough to get you to come to me, so, I believe that maybe it was some sort of support for whatever reason I'm here? Kimi wouldn't leave me, for sure, so..." I said.

He shrugged.

"You...believe me?" I asked.

"Yeah, I do, Nina. You're not crazy, honest. Just very sad," He said, hugging me a little tighter.

I smiled, and closed my eyes.

"Thank you, Kiba. Don't tell anyone, though, please," I said.

"Alright,"

And my secret was enclosed to Kiba.

* * *

I slept in a tavern, where the woman said she would let me pay monthly, like an apartment. I thanked her, because it was cheap.

"If you weren't so handsome, it would be more expensive," I had heard her mutter.

Great.

So, apparently, I'm going to have girls tailing me all day.

I sighed, woke up, showered, and then straightened my hair after blow-drying it. I had bought both after the salonist gave me them for cheap. Great, huh?

I got everything cheap in this city, because I had usually bought things from women.

Apparently, I was a very handsome boy.

At least they were buying it.

My voice was slightly too high for a guy's voice, so I would go out to where nobody could hear me, and scream. It made my voice raspy, and deeper. I actually sounded like a guy. I got out of the room, said hello to the lady, she giggled, and I walked out.

I found the academy, and when they were done teaching, I asked them to take the test for becoming a ninja.

"You have to learn in a class first," The guy replied.

"Yes, but I happen to know enough to pass the test. Please let me take it, and then if I fail, I will go to a class," I said.

He nodded.

"Excuse me, but I cannot tell. Who are you, and are you a girl or a boy?" He asked.

"I'm Kimisuke Kaoru, and I am a boy," I said.

"What do I need to do?" I asked.

"Produce at least four clones. Normally, it is two, but seeing as how you would have to be put on a team immediately, it is harder," He said.

I only nodded.

I made four, and sat there boredly. Two sat down, and the other two looked around pointlessly. He timed me for about ten minutes, then nodded.

"You can disperse them, now," He said. They all lined up, bowed to me, and left.

"Did you make them do that?" He asked.

"No, it's normal," I said.

He nodded with a weird look on his face.

"Your team regularly meets ten minutes to the west walking from here," He said.

I only nodded, and stood up.

I bowed to him, thanking him, and then I left.

I walked there, and in ten minutes I was in a clearing. A girl and a boy were sparring, a teacher sitting there, watching. I walked up to the teacher, walking slightly out of the sparring zone.

"I'm in your squad now, I'm Kimisuke Kaoru," I said, simply.

He raised his eyebrow at me, and nodded. I watched them fight, following the moves, and then the boy had lost.

They turned to us, and since they were in their own sparring world, they stared suprisingly at me.

"This is your new teammate, Kimisuke Kaoru, and...uhh... I don't know much more about Kaoru," He said.

They sat down next to us, eyeing my cloak strangely.

"Uhh, are you a girl or a guy?" The girl asked.

"I'm a guy, actually," I said.

"Oh," They all said.

"Haha, I couldn't tell, because of your skinny jeans and your face is kinda feminine, but hearing you speak, I can tell you're a guy," She said.

I only nodded.

"This is Taraki Miyu, and Kateru Sora. I am your sensei, Mizaki Kioshi," He said.

"Hello," I replied.

Miyu and Sora proceeded to tell me about themselves, and I listened. Kioshi told me a bit about himself, and then I was prompted to tell them about me.

"I'm Kimisuke Kaoru. I'm fourteen, I like the night, and I dislike nosy people. My dream...I suppose I really don't have one. Thats all, I guess," I said.

Miyu smiled widely. She immediately started bugging me. She asked me more about me and I scowled.

"I did say I dislike nosy people," I said to her, and then closed my eyes, leaving her in a shocked silence.

* * *

**Hahahahahahahahahaha...if you guys didn't catch whose cloak it was, she stole it from Vincent Valentine. From FF7. Bwahahaha...I'm inter-mixing hints of shows/movies/games now...(x**


	6. Learning

**Haha oshiz...there's a thunderstorm/tornado watch...yay...**

* * *

I awoke in my bed after a sound rest, and stood up slowly, smiling in the mirror. I took a quick shower, and got dressed, my hair would dry naturally. I walked out to the dining area, smiling as I sat down for breakfast with Kiba's family. Kiba and I acted like nothing had happened last night, there was no awkwardness. I knew of him, and he knew of me. All was fine between us.

"Hey, Kiba! Could I watch you train?" I asked, smiling.

"Of course," He said, grinning.

We then walked to his training area in the woods, and I sat near the sidelines, watching him train.

Ninjas were amazing. They could do pretty much anything.

Kiba had walked over to me.

"Nina?" He said.

"Kiba! I want you to train me! I wanna be a ninja!" I said.

He smiled and ruffled my hair.

"Fine, but feel free to give up any time," He grinned.

"You know that wont be happening," I said.

He just smiled and winked.

* * *

I sparred with the boy who had lost to the girl, and I had won. Quickly. I then did it with the girl, and I had won again, but it had taken much longer. Apparently, I was the strongest in the group.

I could not tell if that was good or bad.

"Alright, Kaoru, I'm going to come at you. Hold me off as long as you can," Kioshi said.

I nodded, swiftly taking my stance. He came at me, and he was strong. I did nothing but block and dodge, because I honestly just couldn't do anything else. He was fast. He was strong. My blocking had tension behind it, and I was sure if I could know when I was getting tired, then I would not last much longer. Fighting did not bring the burning sensation of living, only if I tried to get it to. I kept blocking and dodging for the longest time, and I finally got a swipe at him. He jumped back, looking up at me. He grinned. I got another few swipes, but then was back to dodging. He jumped back to get a better swing, and I ran behind a tree. The trees would give me some help, and I could make a quick clone, too. I did just that, left it at the bottom of the tree, jumped on a low branch, and vaulted to where I could see everything. My clone got attacked by Kioshi, and they went back into the clearing. I tried my best to hide my chakra, but I wasn't the best at it. My clone got hit in the sshoulder with a kunai, and Kioshi's back was now towards me. I jumped off of the tree and landed on the ground quietly and softly. Though, Kioshi sensed me and turned around, thinking I was a clone, and stuck me in the shoulder. I felt the dull impact between skin and the kunai, and I looked over to it. It was imbedded into my shoulder. I stared at it like it was interesting, and Kioshi looked between the clone and I.

"Kaoru," He began, "Your clone isn't despersing," He finished to my clone.

"Which one is the clone?" We both said.

You're not meant to mess with your sensei. That was clear. I knew he could beat me and he could have done so earlier.

I was still looking at the kunai in my shoulder. I pulled it out slowly, and blood followed it. I just looked at it. My clone came over to me, bowed, and left.

"This might need to be covered," I said, looking up.

Miyu's eyes were wide, and Sora just looked at me strangely. Kioshi's eyes were slightly narrowed. He came over to me with bandages, and Sora came over, too. I unbuckled my cloak a bit, and lifted up the side that had been hit. Sora helped heal it a little it, and he apologized, saying he really didn't know much else about healing. Kioshi had then bandaged it. They couldn't really see my chest, and I had made sure to bandage down the small amount that I had there. I did not wince when he pulled the bandage on me viciously, seeing if it would hurt. I just looked up at him.

"That would have hurt even me," He whispered to me.

"What is your deal, kid?" He asked.

I acted as though I had no idea what he was talking about.

I stood, thanked him for the bandage, and walked over to my teammates.

We then practiced chakra control.

Kioshi watched us closely.

* * *

Kiba had begun to train me, and he said that I was the best at genjustsu and ninjutsu! Of course, we did really little things, and didn't get anything big done, but I was happy. I got some ninja training, and it was exciting. Kiba taught me how to make clones, too! I was good at it because of the creativity that came with it. All I had to do is picture another me standing right next to me, slap some chakra in it, and kaboom! Another me. Kiba said if we kept practicing with that, by the end of the day I could take the test to become a ninja. So, thats exactly what we did! I became a nice little add-on to Shikamaru's team. Kiba slapped me on the back, grinning, and told me what a great job I did.

His mom had made some sort of steak, and it was laid out on the table. I cut into my piece, working on it, and a small conversastion had started about training.

We talked for a long time, and his mother seemed quite taken to me. She would laugh when I spoke, and she would also try to talk to me about a bunch of other stuff, too. She asked me if I had met any of the other girls in town.

"No, I haven't, but I sure can't wait," I said, smiling.

"You seem like a very nice girl, Nina! I'm actually quite glad Kiba found you!" She said.

"Haha, thank you!" I said.

After that, Kiba and I went to bed, getting ready for more training the next day.

**I wanted to be strong. **

**I wanted to be a ninja.**

* * *

I awoke the next day, took a shower, dried, and straightened. I wnt to another day of training, and we continued the last lesson.

Miyu liked me, and she was good at taijutsu and genjutsu. She was kind of annoying, because she would ask me about myself.

Sora was a good person, and spoke the truth and his mind. He was a healer, not very strong in taijutsu or ninjutsu. I was fine with him.

Kioshi was smart. He would quesetion my abilities, and investigate about my clones. How they got hit, but would not fall. He was curious about how nothing hurt for me. I would not answer many of his questions.

I remembered how strong Kioshi was.

I remembered how long it took to even get a hit on him.

I remembered how I needed to stay way from Nina.

I remembered how I was dead.

I remembered how I felt when I made clones and used chakra.

I remembered how I needed to be a boy.

**I remembered how I needed to be strong.**

**I remembered how I needed to be a ninja.**

* * *

**[Narrative]**

Time passed.

Quickly.

For both of them.

Both became stronger and stronger.

Nina had made friends with everyone she could get her hands on, everyone liked her quite alot. She became another sister to Kiba. The earth and wind still loved her, but water and fire had remained vigilant against her. She learned the ways of the ninja. She was strongest in Ninjutsu and Genjutsu, and was okay with Taijutsu. Konoha was her home. Her destened home. She could tell. She had a real family there, and she was doing something she liked very much. She still sang her and Kimi's song, and she stopped crying as she sang it. She would never forget Kimi, and she mourned her death somewhere inside of her.

Kimi kept going by her boy's name, the illusion never ending. She had no friends, and too many fangirls. She was detatched, and fire and water seemed to follow her whim. She became as strong as she coul, she could afford to be nothing else. She was strong in Ninjutsu and Taijutsu, ut Genjutsu evaded her as it always did. Suna was her place to stay, and she was ready to depart if Nina came. The place was a safehouse for now, and she waited for it to catch on fire so she would have to flee. She hardened her emotions, and only let them through in battle. She would be cautious for Nina, staying out of her life now.

Both girls became shockingly different, even more so than it was.

They thought of eachother constantly, though both on different terms of thinking.

The chuunin exams were approaching rapidly, and they were both ready for it.

**[Narrative]**

* * *

**Anyways, I'm amazed at how quickly I'm getting reviews, and I'd like to thank the following peoples who are amazingly awesome:**

KiyUzumaki  
Kuriseteina  
dyingOFboredom  
Blaze, You anonymous person.  
pink-pajamas12  
misaai  
LittleMiniGaara

Aaaaaannnddd Leogirl321 **Thanks to you for reviewing each chapter as they come by you!**

**Thanks to all for reviewing!**


	7. Papers

**OH MY GOD. I'M SOOO SORRY. LIKE, NO JOKE. School, work, florida, and my birthday was all shoved in my face and I haven't been able to update. I suck, i know. Here's your chapter guys.**

**Once again I'm soooo sorrrryyyy...  
**

* * *

I awoke, followed my daily routine, and left my room once more. I walked down the stairs, and found the innkeeper.

"Miss?" I asked.

"Oh, yes?" She asked, smiling.

I handed her my rent money.

"Why thank you for paying the rent, honey!" She said, laying a hand on my shoulder.

I stiffened.

"Please refrain from touching me," I said.

I walked the few feet to the door and began on my way.

I had only been attacked by one girl, thankfully dodging. This was either very bad, or very good.

I looked around slowly to make sure there were no group attacks.

There were none.

This confused me greatly. Perhaps they've found someone else to fangirl upon? My eyes widened at the thought.

I slowly slunk away, still being careful.

Women in this world are crazy.

Arriving at the training spot, I was graced with the sight of Kioshi with stacks of papers.

The chuunin exams.

* * *

Kiba awoke me, smiling.

"Hey, it's time to go to training, Nina," He said softly.

I grinned, and jumped up quickly.

I put on my ninja clothes after he left, and then attached my pouch. I smiled, beginning to skip down the stairs. That did NOT work over well. I ended up falling flat on my face. I slowly stood, giving Kiba's mother a thumbs up as she giggled quietly.

The room smelled of eggs and bacon, a place reserved for me at the table. I sat down in my spot quickly, smiling to everyone. We ate slowly, laughing and enjoying our food. Kiba cracked constant jokes, making the family smile. I managed to come up with witty comebacks most of the time. Well... usually. Kiba had said something teasingly to me, so I quickly replied with a "Your mom!".

"Your mom what, young miss? Do you have something to say about me?" She smiled at me, her eyes glinting.

I loved this place. These people were my family. There was no doubt to it. They were so friendly. Kiba's mother, especially. She treats me as if I'm her own daughter. Every night she comes to my room to tuck me in, and she thinks I'm asleep. What she doesn't know, is that I secretly wait for her to come in and kiss me on the forehead. His whole family is wholesome, and never really is angry. His dad is the only one that ever does get mad- if at all.

Soon enough, though, Kiba and I had to leave for training.

We walked quietly to our training grounds, smiling at the earlier events.

But that's when I saw it. Kurenai holding that stack of familiar papers.

The chuunin exams.

* * *

I disregarded the whole exam talk, not even caring. I'd heard it all before. There were a few extra things about going because we were sand genin or whatever. I listened to those.

I signed the paper saying "Yes" immediately, giving it back to Kioshi.

He looked at me strangely.

"You don't even have to think about it? You could die, you know," He said.

I looked up at him.

"If I die, then I die," I said, slowly.

I then walked away, leaving the rest of the people in my team staring.

Let them.

I went to another training grounds quickly, needing to train. I've been doing it every day for as long as possible until my physical body collapses. Then I drag myself up, make myself do a few more, then eat, drink, and sleep.

I take my stance quickly, ready to begin training. A worn out human-like sack looks at me from the other side of the training grounds.

I begin running, as fast as I can. Wind whips through my hair, and the cloak wavers behind me. I do sprints for as long as I wish to, then I drink a bit of water. I then attack the sack of a human quickly, punches making the cloth dent and ripple, kicks almost cracking the post.

I then close my eyes, and create clones to spar with. They all smirk in my mind, taking faces of the people I hate the most. They come at me, and I begin acting on my instincts. Kunai and shuriken become slowly embedded into my clones, and I make new ones every time one dies.

Suddenly, though I hear walking towards me, and I'm in front of the person in a flash, my eyes still closed, ready to kill them. I, of course, thought it was a clone.

"Hey, hey! Dude! OPEN YOUR EYES. Don't kill me, sheesh!" I hear.

My eyes open slowly, and I sigh when I see someone other than myself.

Kankurou.

I look at him dully.

I turn away from him, dismissing my clones. They bow and leave, and then I turn back to the three sand siblings.

"We're sorry. We were supposed to have this training spot today," Temari said, politely.

I just looked at her.

"Find someplace else, I'm busy," I said, briskly turning away.

"Hey, that was rude! Didn't you hear her? This is ours today!" Kankurou shouted.

"Yeah, that wasn't very nice!" I hear Temari say.

I turned around and looked at them, narrowing my eyes.

"Scram," I said.

"Why I oughtta-"

"Temari. We will train someplace else today," Gaara's voice rings out.

"B-But-"

"Che,"

Then I hear their footsteps walking slowly away.

Good.

And I resume my training.

* * *

I thought it over, quickly. I certainly wouldn't die. I wasn't in the group that was killed by Gaara, and not much else killing went on, so I'd be fine. Not to mention Kiba's team had made it through. I would be totally fine. So I signed off "Yes," and handed it to Kurenai.

"You don't want to think this one over?" She asked.

"Nahhh, I'm confident in all of us," I said, smiling.

She smiled at me warmly.

"Alright, then," She said.

Kurenai actually liked me quite a lot. I guess it was some kind of maternal thing. You know, how she's never had a kid? I think she sees me as a child or something. She's always happy when I have faith in others. She loves it when she sees us all getting stronger and faster. I have too many mothers.

But I suppose that's a good thing, not really having one in the other world. They left me to mature by myself at that house, to fear that a robber would know I was home alone.

That's why I'm not going to be weak anymore.

I won't be scared like that, ever again.

I'll build myself up until I'm sure I can take care of myself.

I begin training with Kiba, a smile on my face, ready for the future to happen.

We start off with a lot of taijutsu practices, for I'm not very good at them.

Kiba treats me gently, though, he doesn't really want to hurt me. I smiled at that.

My life here was amazing.

My kicks reach him, probably albeit slower than a regular ninja.

He just laughs and shakes his head, dodging quickly.

"No, no, _faster_, Miss turtle," He teases.

"Turtles are the ones that always win the race!" I retorted quickly.

He smiled.

I 'humph-ed' and tried to kick faster. He nodded, and had to actually block one.

"YES," I shouted.

Everyone that was training quickly turned to us. Well...everyone but Shiro.

He was used to this by now.

"You finally had to block one! YEEEESSSSSSSSS," I shouted again, jumping in the air.

Kiba shook his head quickly.

* * *

My limbs were numb, probably useless.

Despite this, I stood. I closed my eyes, and dashed to the worn out sack. I kicked it. Again. And again. I threw punches. I threw kicks.

I did whatever I could.

And I remember all too suddenly that trick clone I had placed.

There was a loud ripping noise, and I felt warmth spread through my back.

I looked up at my clone, my own face looking back at me.

My bleeding body was looked upon with disinterest. How familiar.

_Ssssccccccccccccrrrrrritchhhh..._

_I stood, sobbing loudly._

_My scooter laid about somewhere, my father standing on the sidewalk. Large scrapes began to form all up my forearms, my knees worse off than my arms._

_My father looked down at me with disinterest._

_"What are you crying for? Be quiet, stupid child,"_

_"Clean it out. Put a bandage on it. Do something,"_

_I smelled it on him. The booze. _

_That's actually the first time he slapped me._

I crookedly smiled, and stood up. I killed my clone quickly, and made my way home.

The lady looked up at me, gasping quietly.

"Honey, what happened to you?" She asked.

"Training," I responded.

She looked surprised at the lack of pain in my voice.

I believe I then fell unconscious.

* * *

**Again, I am amazed at the amount of reviews! I'm used to getting one a chappie so getting so many has blown me away! Thank youuu!(:**


	8. Pureblood

**Same widely-know excuse: SCHOOL.**

**

* * *

**

I woke up slowly, finding white walls around me.

And I panic.

I sit up quickly. Hospitals.

The only thing that I hadn't thought of. How could I forget?

They would know I'm a girl, it'd get out.

I furrowed my eyebrows. Suddenly a nurse came in.

"I am your head nurse, I'll be taking care of you. Of course, I'm the only one with your information, and I won't tell anyone. But, would you like to explain to me why you look like a handsome boy?" Se asked, polite and confused.

My eyes widened considerably. I blanked for a moment, and then I saw the woman laying on the floor.

She was dead.

I put my hands on my face, slowly gathering what happened. No.

I can't be held for this!

I would be on the news!

NINA WOULD SEE ME.

She would see me in the papers.

They'd all know I was a girl...

No. I couldn't let it happen.

I couldn't!

I quickly locked the door and dropped the curtains.

What was I going to do?

* * *

This was one of my favorite parts of the series! Gaara would visit, and though he would be a total cold-ass, I'd still meet him! His angst was kind of cute, but I wasn't really into him. His brother is an obvious PERV, and I'll make sure to stay clear of him. My kohona life was going along peacefully; You know, sparring, bleeding, and training.

All very peaceful things.

I go out in the woods often, grass-whistling or sitting still for so long that animals pass by me without a single thought.

It was amazing, really. I loved nature so much.

Often a deer would come up to me, I would pat it's head, and then a wolf would wander into the area, and the deer would promptly leave. Wolves liked to lay with me in the grass.

Did you know that?

They're not always bloodthirsty hunting animals.

They like to relax, too.

Birds flit around sometimes, but usually carry on with the currents of the air. I envy most of them, being free without a single thought, the wind flowing with themselves. Most animals were gentle. Humans just provoke them, I guess.

You know the funny thing, though?

I'll let you onto a little secret.

Humans are technically animals, too.

We're smarter than most though, I guess.

Currently, I was sitting in the very forest I was talking about.

A cub was curled up to me, it had lost it's parents.

It's soft gray fur was a nice color, strangely not dull at all. It was a warm little thing, really. It whimpered and made small noises in it's sleep. It made me smile, really. To have something like this curled up, content with me.

Soon enough, though, it's parents came walking slowly towards me, the rest of the pack hiding in bushes and such. The baby gave a small yawn, and clumsily strode up to it's parents. The moter was a russet brown, the father the same gray as the wolf.

The mother gave it a sniff, approved, and they trotted off into the forest together.

I smiled slowly.

The reuniting of a family.

How precious.

* * *

My solution was a huge risk. One I didn't know if I could make or not. Currently, though, it was my only choice. I propped the woman with my kunai pouch in her hand. I created a simple trap that made a wound on my shoulder that looked like the trajectory looked like it came from the woman herself. It worked of course, and then I placed the kunai back into her wound, closely, carefully. It was a long shot, but I felt it would work. I made it look like the impact of my wound was close, too. Her body laid literally less than a foot away from the bed. I would make up a story.

She wanted to touch me, she was crooked.

When I said no, she tried to stab me!

Being a ninja, my instincts reacted as a threat and hit her!

What a perfect story.

I pressed the help button repeatedly, a doctor soon coming in.

I faked pain, and looked horrified as I clutched my mid-chest tightly. I groaned slowly.

"Help me, please?" I asked pathetically.

What an actress I am.

What a fool everyone else is.

"Right away! What happened here?" The doctor asked.

"I-She-It was-" I said, frantically stuttering.

"Hey, hey. Calm down. Don't worry. It's over now," He said.

"Yes, yes. You're right. I need to pull myself together," I said, like I was having an epiphany.

"The nurse came in, she wanted to touch me...I said no, for I'm in love with a wonderful girl, and she tried to stab me! Sir, I am a ninja, and when she stabbed me, my reflexive instincts kicked in. Dear god, I've killed her, haven't I? Oh, dear god, no. Dear god, not someone innocent! I can't believe this, oh god..,"

So. Much. Bull. I faked myself in hysterics, heck, for extra measure, I tried to make it real and my heart pounded faster and faster. Blood seeped quicker out of my shoulder wound, and I "winced". The doctor was in shock, but totally buying it. He began healing me as quickly as possible.

He called in a squad to help the woman, but even I knew that she was too late to be saved.

But to kill someone innocent, pure.

It had actually shaken me.

She...

Hadn't done anything wrong.

_Nothing._

Pure, clean blood was on my hands.

It'll never come off, will it?

Her blood will taint my hands as long as I live.

And I think it terrified me.

I'm not sure, of course. Though, would that be the emotion? Terrified?

I think so.

I don't think I can remember...

* * *

I stood, something was wrong.

Horribly.

I looked around, panicked, hearing the voices of the forest cry.

A deer was galloping at it's maximum speed.

Wolves were...running away?

Birds scattered from trees, obviously frightened.

A force made trees fall, a force no greater than-

...

Sakura?

"NINA. GIRLTALK. NOW," Was all I heard before I was flung through the city.

"Ino is such a whore."

"I can't believe it!"

"She's so clingy!"

"You know?"

"Sasuke's all hottttttt...and then Ino is all BLEHHH, it doesn't work!"

"SAKURA, CALM DOWN. TELL IT TO ME STRAIGHT," I said.

"Ino totally got a date with Sasuke! PISSES ME OFF!" She practically yelled back.

"He probably just owes her something and she's calling it a date, you know?" I sweatdropped.

"Hey, you're right. LYING, OVERZEALOUS, EVIL, STUPID, HO!"

I sweatdropped.

"Sakura, can I go now?"

"NO! You're sleeping over," She smiled.

"When was this arra-"

"I asked Kiba's mom this morning, sheeshh," She said.

I held a deadpanned look on my face.

"Really Sakura, really?" I asked.

"YEAP," Se responded slowly.

Dear lord,

Please help me make it through this night. I'd rather not die at a sleepover, thank you. Let me live through it, please.

"First, we're going to talk about BOYS~!"

Kill me now.

* * *

LATERRRR3

* * *

Me and Sakura were actually having a good time.

I know, scary, right?

She's not so annoying in person, really.

She is on screen, though...

Actually, she's quite the fun person to talk to.

We've decorated her wall, and made crafts of sorts.

Of course, we've taken pictures.

Who wouldn't?

They were pretty fun. I had my puffy cheeks face on in one, and she was sticking her tongue out. Another was us being "serious"-aka lauging our asses off TRYING to be serious.

We've painted our nails- with much protest from me.

She's nagged, so have I.

She loves the crap out of Sasuke, but she's got a "I'm-in-denial-I-don't-like-him" with Naruto.

It's kind of funny, getting to know her.

I had always thought she was kind of annoying, being a fangirl and all, but hey, so was I.

Birds of a feather flock together.

It was fun, I guess. I met her parents, they were pretty normal, though.

She did my hair, and it looks amazing. I did what I could with hers.

We told each other stories- though I didn't have many to share.

I guess she's not horrid, you know?

Actually quite fun.

Surprisingly.

I think everything isn't really the way it is on the show- I think it's quite different.

People's personalities are kind of different, and they even are kinder than on the show.

I think that makes me happy.

* * *

**GRAAAH. Thank you reviewers. You make me feel FUZZY INSAIDE. :D  
**


	9. Anger

**Yes, darkness and despair does rain down from my school… And I'm sorry for such a short chapter, I have to go to Florida now.**

* * *

The doctor soon let me out of the hospital, and I left, shaken.

I was forgetting emotions.

There was pure blood on my hands.

This was getting very bad.

Forgetting emotions would lead to bad acting; bad acting cancels out lying completely.

That would ruin the whole plan.

I couldn't do that. So while I was training that day, I tried to remember all of my emotions. I had passed by happiness and joy; knowing those already. I began with terror, then proceeding.

Now I was practicing anger, throwing blows out at the work out sack blindly. My clones vanished by the second. Familiar footsteps came up behind me, and thinking it was my clone again, I did a quick turn and punched Kankurou full out in the face. I stopped quickly after that. How many times would this happen? Once was enough, and now a second time? This was getting stupid.

"What the fuck, man!" I heard.

I let the anger and the developing hatred seep out of me, my usual emotionless haze coming onto my face.

"Ugh, it's you. Get out, I'm too busy to deal with this," I said.

"You!" He shouted.

"Yes, me, now go away," I said slowly.

"This spot was ours today," Gaara's voice rings.

I turn and look him in the eye. His icy, bloodthirsty eyes met mine. My emotionless ones met him.

"Scram," I said slowly.

His sand began swirling slowly around him.

"Get out of the area before I kill you," He said slowly, menacingly.

"I'm sorry? You're going to _**kill me**_?" I said.

A type of spasm erupted in my chest, and it came out as…

Laughter?

Taking it in stride, I looked at him crookedly.

"You can't kill the dead," I stated.

Temari and Kankurou looked at me like I was insane. Gaara only looked at me curiously.

"What, want proof?" I asked.

Not waiting for an answer, I took a kunai and stabbed it into my shoulder fiercely then dragged it down. My shoulders were receiving a lot of injuries lately. I neither winced nor yelped. I then took it slowly out of my body, and flung it at their feet. I placed my hand on it as it bled, looking at the blood.

"Killing the dead isn't worth your time, Sabaku no Gaara," I stated.

Gaara's sands retreated. He sat there, scowling.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"Kimisuke Kaoru," I said my fake name.

Then he turned on his heel and walked away. I personally was not surprised.

I then started working on my emotions again.

* * *

Chuunin exams were coming up so rapidly! I was excited and scared. So much would be happening, and Kiba keeps asking me what's going to happen! I, of course, refused to release any information. It was so tempting, though! To talk about it, to let him know exactly what was going to happen! I wanted to so badly. I was training quite often, and I was getting better!

I'm actually not a hindrance for Kiba and everyone now.

It was astounding, the amount of training I had done. I actually seemed like I knew what I was doing. It was quite fun, really. Learning all the things I had dreamed about learning. It was fun, and I couldn't wait to do more of it. I was going into Ichiraku ramen, and I bumped into Sasuke.

"You, you're Nina, right?" He asked.

"Yes, yes I am. Why?" I asked.

"Sit down," He said.

I didn't deny it. I sat down slowly. He sat down next to me, silent.

"Um, one chicken ramen, please," I said, awkwardly.

The owner brought it quickly, and I stared at Sasuke expectantly.

"So, did you need to talk to me or anything?" I asked.

"Yes," He said.

I stared at him.

I sighed, and started eating.

The ramen here was amazing. Nothing like the microwave ramen at home. It was delicious, with many fixings. It tasted heavenly, to be honest. The smooth noodles and the real-flavored broth helped make the soup it's own. I smiled slowly, thinking of the differences.

"Do you know a girl named Kimi?" He asked.

I spat out whatever I was eating.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"Kimi, have you heard of her?" He said again.

"Yes, she's dead. Who told you about her?" I asked bitterly.

"I take it you don't really like her, then?" He asked.

"She was one of my most important people," I said.

"Was?"

"I told you, she died! Can we stop talking about this?" I snapped.

He turned away and left.

I ate the rest of my ramen in a stubborn silence.

How did he know who Kimi was? I've only told Kiba.

Kiba.

He told someone? SASUKE, of all people? No. Nobody tells Sasuke anything. Which means that Kiba told someone and it circulated! People will think I'm crazy! I come from another world, GUAYS! That sounded just great, didn't it?

I bet it does.

Now I'm insane to society.

Great job, Nina.

I quickly paid for my meal and left for home.

I became furious for the first time in a long while.

I stomped all the way home, ready to give Kiba an earful.

"KIBA!" I shouted as I got inside the house.

"GET YOUR TEENAGER BUTT OVER HERE!" I shouted once again, scowling.

He jumped, and looked confused.

"My room. You. Go. NOW," I screeched, severely pissed off.

Noted; this doesn't happen often. Though, when I get mad, I get MAD.

He marched up the stairs into my room.

I slammed the door.

"Who did you tell?" I seethed.

"What?" He asked.

"You know what I mean! Who did you tell about me?" I asked furiously.

"Nobody! I swear! I'm not a promise breaker, Nina!" He said quickly.

"Then how does Sasuke know who KIMI is? Huh? Nobody ever tells him anything! It would have circulated and gotten to him!" I said, angry at him to the tenth degree.

"Nina, I swear, I haven't told ANYONE," He said quickly.

"Do you need me to prove it?" He asked, getting out something to cut his hand.

"No, it's not necessary," I said, closing my eyes slowly.

Being angry really took a lot of energy out of me.

"I'm sorry, Kiba. I haven't been angry in such a long time," I said, feeling the energy begin to drain from my body.

I felt my vision begin fading, and I tried to find something to hold onto. Finding nothing, I fell forwards, finally fainting; the last stage of me being upset.

I felt myself fall onto Kiba, and I gave into the darkness soon after that.

* * *

I stood from bed, knowing what day it was. Today was the day I would leave. I learned that we would be traveling to Kohona with Gaara's team. I wasn't excited. I wasn't scared or unhappy.

I just didn't care.

I met up with them at the gates of Suna. Miyu and Sora smiled next to me, Sora coming up to me to talk.

"I know you really don't like to talk and all, but I just wanted to know one thing," He said.

His face was that of innocence. I slowly cracked, and some sort of gentleness swept over my face. He had reminded me of Nina a little. This was dangerous.

"What is it?" I asked.

His eyes widened slowly, and then he smiled. Then he became uncomfortable again and looked up at me slowly.

"W-would you be my friend?" He shifted, looking down.

I groaned. I couldn't say no when he reminded me of Nina. I couldn't afford do have this kid as a friend, though.

"Yeah," is what came out of my mouth.

I looked up in shock, and so did he. I closed my eyes and shook my head.

I looked at him, and nodded. I then started to walk away.

"Are we leaving?" I asked.

Kioshi nodded.

Then we began to walk into the seemingly never-ending desert.

We did the same thing we did when I had come to Suna. I had slow flashbacks, and tried to focus upon the task at hand.

We moved, slowly but surely, before I saw those familiar gates.

I would have to be as careful as possible. I had to make sure that I screamed daily, in order for Nina not to notice my voice. I would have to gather information and stay away from Sasuke. He would surely know it was me at first glance.

Like I said, he's too smart for his own good.

With this advice in my head, I strolled slowly into the gates that I had left from not too long ago.

* * *

**So; I'm glad you all like this story. Keep pressing the little button down there, it gives me inspiration! Again, sorry for the little chapter guys!**


	10. AN

**! my story, Night's Clarity, will be revamped by my friend, This is Nothing but a Dream, I am not going to write on this site anymore! I'm giving her full permission to the plot, characters, and storyline.**

**I've been inactive for a very long time, and my friend likes the story's idea. I'm going to take it down after she catches up to the chapter I'm on.**

**I'm really sorry for giving up guys, but it's been so long and my brain cannot even remember how I wanted to go on with this.**

**My friend is great at improv, so she'll take it over, okay? **

**She's revamping, rewriting the chapters essentially with the same skeletal structure. If you liked this story, then you'll like the revamp, I promise.**

**Also our writing styles are kind of similar, so yeah.**

**Thank you so much!**


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